Reasons for an Ant Infestation

So I come home from another School Board meeting last night (I know real shocker!) and there is a strange Lego formation on my counter. I really didn't even think twice about it...the kids were playing with Lego’s, they weren't put away...(another real shocker!)

This morning while I am getting my coffee, my middle mischievous child is getting into the wheat thins. I, of course being the kind hearted, helpful parent that I am say:

"Hey, Get your hand out of there, if you want breakfast, fix yourself a bowl of cereal."
(Yeah I know, I AM the world’s greatest mom aren't I?)

Caroline looks at me all indignant and says:
"Moooooom it’s not for me, it’s for my Ants."

I want to remind you all that I haven't had my coffee yet, and I am facing a day of fasting**, neither of which makes Pie a happy girl, or the sharpest tool in the shed for that matter.

After about 2 minutes of looking at the contraption, then at Caroline, and then at my floor where the Jeff’s Way Battalion of Ants are marching in through the doors to attack my kitchen, I start to flip out. Looking inside her ant house, I find ground up crackers, and yes, about 5 ants…she not only built them a house, but is feeding them.

Since we have started construction we have had a steady stream of Ant Armies attacking our house. We have battled them stealthily, but now I realize that we have had a child in our house aiding and abetting the enemy. I am not sure if there is a punishment for that kind of treason… I am still looking for one.

However, from the Ants perspective, they probably feel that they are in a prison camp as they are thrown into a small cell together and have large wheat thins hurled at their heads…They will die hero’s to their kind I guess, having gone to get food and never returned.

**Its just me, but if you are going to schedule a procedure where someone has to fast for 7 hours before hand, don’t you think you would schedule it in the morning? OH NO, my appointment is at 2, let me tell you what a raving lunatic, head spinning, nasty human being I am going to be by 2…(I know I am whining when there are lots of people that don’t eat for days at a time…I just get really, really, frighteningly crabby with out food)…Jamie is going to be armed with a big stick and a cage when he comes to pick me up for my appointment!