Monday, May 5, 2008

being lazy

You may think that I am being lazy, but on the contrary. I am just relaying information to you that you may not have read I am not lazy, I am informative. (that is how I prefer to think of it, so lets just go with it)

I was tired today, and I mean bone tired. The kind of tired in which, you go to bed at 8:30 and wake up at 7 and still feel like you aren't sure you can manage to take the necessary breath it takes to sit up in bed and get out. Which isn't something I talk about, or complain about a whole lot, but there are some days, that I just don't know if I can do it anymore. No real names for it yet (or at least not ones that everyone agrees to,) so I just chalk it up to some strange unidentified illness that is eating away at my insides and brain...which probably explains a lot huh?

So I got up this morning, Monday, which is my least favorite day of the week anyway. I hate Monday for many reasons, not the least of which being, that over the weekend, the other people that reside in this house with me, find it entertaining to see how much crap they can leave in the floors, and see how much of it will be picked up when they come home on Monday night. It is like a sadistic game show who can make mom break fastest.

I was in no mood to write anything nice, or even seemingly sweet about any of the members of this house hold. I was catching up on a blog that I read called Dooce....I read her letter to her daughter. Suddenly I felt like the Grinch when his socks loosen up and his heart grows three sizes. So here is your informative post.

Her letter, made me realize that I am not the only mentally unstable mother in the world, and at some point, my sincere inability to articulate why I can falling apart and hold it all together, in the same breath, will be realized, and used for good!

Laughing at her description of her daughter as a teenager, I do not only picture my eldest in that role soon, but remember myself being in that role. At some point, you do grow out of it, and you do realize that your parents, flawed at best, still love you, and do the best they can with the information they have at the time they need it. With that said...I will go off and try to make it through today with out falling apart, or damaging my children anymore than I already have.

No comments: