I've Been Lied To

I had heard through the grape vine (which right there is WAY more scientific than a study...) that women who were tortured endured more, and had a higher pain threshold...This really isn't hard for many of us who are married to believe...BUT, after today I looked it up on line, so that I could be really snarky and reference it on my blog. All I could come up with, were articles about how men have a higher threshold for pain than women… UM….they clearly have not been in my house when the stomach flu comes through…Or even just witness my 3 year old boy today!

Now hold on, I am not a man hater, at all. I am not degrading the male population as a bunch of pathetic wimps, not at all. BUT I have to argue just a bit because I have seen the difference in my house, and it ain’t the way the scientists are telling it. There is of course the fact that we could just be freaks of nature in this house, which would be a real shocker… but I doubt it.

As many of you know, there is no "sick day" for moms, or at least very few and far between, we pretty much have to tough out what ever is the affliction of the hour, and go with it. With this said, even my girls (who have been known to break the sound barrier with their screams of despair at the sight of blood after a bad spill) still manage to function with some semblance of normalcy after they have been hurt.

Today walking my girls to the bus stop, Henry tripped over his buggy boots, (which we are having a hard time prying from his molding feet) and fell on the dirt road. Now, I was totally prepared for the scream...you know that is what toddlers do when they hurt themselves. I get it. But Henry? Oh that would be too easy. The boy, rolls over and starts convulsing on the ground screaming at the top of his lungs “OOOOWWWWWWWWWW.”

I scoop him up because I am a good mom, and also because I was a little concerned that someone was going to call the police on me with the decibel of his screaming. I carry him to the end of the road where he commences screaming “I HAVE BLEET, I HAVE BLEET” (for those of you that need a Henry dictionary the translation is “I am bleeding”) I was forced to take a Band-Aid off of my finger and put it on his knee. Thankfully it wasn’t one of the ones that had been on for 4 days and was nasty, I had just changed it this morning. This calmed him for about 2 seconds.

The bus came got the girls, all the while he is screaming about blood and mayhem in the town. He insisted I carry him home because he couldn’t walk. Now, being the really sympathetic mom that I am (and knowing it was the only way I was going to get down the road with out more alarming screams) I carried him home. This was 8 this morning.

IT IS NOW 1:43, and the boy STILL WONT WALK. I have refused to carry him anymore, and resorted to just putting him to bed because clearly, if he is THIS traumatized by a scraped knee, he needs to sleep through the rest of the day, who knows, I bee might fly by him, or his toy car might fall off the table…I mean there is a whole plethora of things that could send him into a frenzied hysteria in this house!

So I think I have been lied to by the scientific community, and I am pretty sure that if Men had babies, we would have only lasted one generation after the word traveled…”Dude, you DO NOT want to go there, the human race isn’t worth it man…”